It all started one winter’s night in the early hours of the morning. A sharp, throbbing pain in my abdomen woke me from my sleep. A pain so intense which seemed to emanate far beyond my physical body and refused to diminish in intensity. Little did I know that this was a physical manifestation of my unfulfilled and senseless wondering in life. A life that did not match anything I had planned or anticipated my future would look like.
Our dreams of the future
Often, we bask in our imagination of what our future lives will hold. We image being successful and for each of us, that has a different meaning. I imagined my life full of adventure, fun, romance, and surrounded by a supportive network of friends and family.
I saw myself working in nature with animals, being my own boss, having time to myself and feeling content. However, things don’t always work out how we want them to. Many of us set off on the path to happiness where our dreams come true.
But obstacles, opportunities, love, money, and tragedies change our course and may divert us from our dreams. We may find ourselves taking steps in opposite or different directions and convince ourselves it is only for a short period.
We believe that after the promotion or a large sum of money in our bank account we will get back on track. We do this multiple times and keep moving further and further away from our path. The further we stray the the harder it seems to find our way back.
Nevertheless, the light at the end of the tunnel persists and recurrent flashbacks of the future we had planned out down to the very last detail.
An inner reality check
We know that being able to dream and have illusions about life is an integral part of being human. As children, we are encouraged to explore different realities and often dress up as different characters from our favourite books.
But there comes a point in all our lives when we must face the reality of life. We realise that we are not living a life full of adventure, fun, or romance, nor are we surrounded by a happy and supportive network of friends and family. When there is a disparity between our dreams for the future and our current situation, disillusion reveals itself.
This triggers a domino effect of feelings of disappointment, overwhelming sadness, loss of purpose and feeling defeated. We look back and realise that a battle spanning over multiple decades has come to an end.
Despite fighting tooth and nail for years, the dream drifted further into the distance. But now, it is time to raise our white flag, accept defeat and mourn the loss of our dreams and allows us to heal our wounds.
Letting go of our past dreams.
By allowing ourselves to let go of our dreams, we can mourn the feelings associated with them, let go of the attachment and free ourselves from the bondage/imprisonment of our past illusions/thoughts.
If we can fully experience the death of our dreams, an immense feeling of freedom and gratitude delivers us into the present moment. A moment where there is no past, no future and where we no longer compare, criticise or stress about the outcome.
When we fully accept what is, an inner shift occurs, and our perception of the world completely transforms. We begin to observe the magnificence of life at play and witness it unravel all around us. Life becomes effortless and we realise our struggles had nothing to do with our dreams or future goals.
Our focus shifts and we begin to appreciate the simple things in life. We find fulfilment in observing the world around us.
For some this may be staring up at a winter’s sky filled with clouds shapeshifting into different shapes and combinations of colours, watching dogs interacting and playing in the park, or rejoicing with a grandmother feeding her grandchild.
All these aren’t part of our dreams but are a manifestation of life in its pure form. And, if we are completely honest with ourselves, it is the same feeling we were aspiring to attain by achieving our dreams. That warm fuzzy feeling inside, feeling connected, loved, and complete.
Finding our new path
So, if you find yourself grasping onto past dreams, fear not. Allow yourself to grieve them, watch the matrix of your old thoughts disintegrate and allow new dreams and illusions to form. Letting go of our past thoughts is a direct passage to the present moment, free of attachments.
Remember that life is taking place now, so cherish all the moments and witness all of life’s magical expressions and manifestations. Rather than holding onto the past, enjoy co-creating dreams , then allowing them to pass, and finally mourning their death to make way for new ones to form.
By letting go, we can live our most authentic life in the present moment.
If you are going through a spiritual awakening you may be interested in reading La petit mort. This article discuss the spiritual awakening process and its healing potential.
If you are looking for the top 10 spiritual books to guide you through the awakening process you may want to check out my list of Top 10 spiritual books of all time.